these days

I've come to like country music. I used to hate it with a passion. But I've turned over a new leaf. Anyway, country songs keep on getting stuck in my head, and it's quite annoying; I don't know that many, so it's repetitive, and I don't like it that much yet. I listen to all kinds of music; why this?

The LOTR movies are pretty much written, I think, from the perspective of the Hobbits. I mean, obviously not entirely, but in many circumstances the understanding that the audience is given of the situation seems, to me, to be similar to that of Frodo or his countrymen. Perhaps I see this because, having read the books, I have a deeper understanding of the characters or scenarios than the movies could convey to the average viewer, which makes the movies seem to have a simplistic take on things, something one could associate with the understanding of the Shirelings.
The discrepancies stand out particularly with Aragorn, or at least in my mind. Perhaps this was a more intentional change, to make him more endearing in contrast to Boromir (or to highlight Boromir's inordinate zeal), but Viggo's Aragorn was much more reserved about who he was than Tolkien's. In the books, he is much more open to the fact that he was the Heir of Isildur, although still hesitant to take the throne, and the issue of his lordship comes up a great deal more. Maybe more of a point needed to be made of it in the books, whereas in the shorter-form media of film, one or two mentions were all it took.
ANYWAY what I'm trying to say here, as awesome a figure as Aragorn is, I've always identified more with Eomer. Karl Urban acted him wonderfully. One of the best cinematic depictions of sorrow and anguish (as I understand it) is his reaction to Eowyn's body at Pelennor.

Recently, I have also come to understand his "Do not trust to hope. It has forsaken these lands." on a much deeper level. Having had my life put at odds with what I had hoped it to be has made hoping very hard. I simply can't expend that energy anymore, at least not with any certainty. The ethereal realm of "plans for the future" remains ethereal...I simply cannot visualize as I have before. This is somewhat saddening, but I make up for it with flights of fancy and such-plans that I don't think will come true, but are fun to think about, and that I can aim my life towards with no expectation of hitting them directly.
I have also recently realized that I don't like wishing, particularly about things already certain. To me, wishing that I was born in a different time, or that something had never happened, or that I hadn't burned that when I cooked it, or that I had remembered to do this, or whatever-it's like a twist of the knife. This thing is already not true-why emphasize your disappointment by asking for the impossible? It's tiring, to me.

Man, I have way too many heavy finishes. Just...go look at something happy now or something.